Looks Like You Picked the Wrong Week to be an Arsenal Fan

Lloyd Bridges picked the wrong week to quit smoking in "Airplane!" You probably picked the wrong week to be an Arsenal fan.

If you are a Gooner, you'll love this. With nothing left to play for this season — fourth place in the league is cemented no matter what happens in their final two games — they have to travel to league-leading Manchester United on Saturday. Wonderful.

Worse still, they could wind up sitting at Old Trafford watching the Reds celebrate. All United needs is a point to seal the Premier League title and all the Gooners in the corner will be able to do nothing but spout invective. They won’t even be allowed to leave the stadium! (Away fans in England are always forced to exit the ground last to avoid any mingling with the home hooligans.)

Because it is also United’s final home game, the trophy should also be in the building, ready to be presented — even more gut-churning for the away fans, that much sweeter for the home crowd.

It’s hard to say what the experience will be like for the players. Players who lose Cup finals have to stay on the pitch to collect their runner-up medals. Players who simply make a league title official leave for the changing room. United would certainly love to rub Arsenal’s noses in their third successive title, but for most of the Arsenal players it may not sting quite as much. After all, the Gunners have been out effectively out of the title hunt since Christmas.

Expect center back Kolo Toure to take it hard, though. And not just because he has been at the heart of the Gunners’ woeful defense this season. He is the only Arsenal player who remembers their last glory-bathed trip to Old Trafford in 2002. As a 21-year-old reserve player, he watched from the stands as Sylvain Wiltord poked Arsenal in front to give them a 1-0 victory and the ecstasy of winning the title at the expense of their bitter rivals on their own patch.

His current partner at the back, Mikael Silvestre, remembers it, too. He was playing for United.